Few questions in life warrant such immense thought and pre-planning. The ‘when’ and ‘where’ of it all should, of course, be considered. But, it's the engagement ring that's imperative to truly ensuring a momentous proposal (and guaranteeing the all-important “yes”)… but how? That's where we at Ishine comes in.
And thus the pressure for buying the right engagement ring begins. Diamond or sapphire? Yellow or white gold? And then there’s the murky waters of how much to spend. What’s clear is that there’s really only one question we can hear across the internet: “Will you... Will you help me find the perfect engagement ring?” Yes! A thousand times, yes! We thought you’d never ask.
We’ve done the research, spoken to the experts and collated the ultimate engagement ring guide to get you set up for the fated one-knee drop. You got this!
How much should I spend on a ring?
“They” say it should be equivalent to a month’s wages (or is it two? Or three?), but is that before or after rent? Gas? Electricity? Groceries? The occasional night out? Resturants? Ground coffee? Avocados?
If you think buying a bag of Haribo Starmix is beginning to look like an efficient option, fear not. Hannah at Lila’s in South East London assuages our money anxiety: “Whether it's $200, whether it's $50,000, each one is super special to whoever is buying it. The rule about spending a month's wages – we don't think that's true. It has to fit each person.”
What should I look for when buying a ring?
Some significant others may have already hinted at the kind of ring they’d like or even shown you the exact style. If that’s the case for you, then you’re on easy street. For those with partners that have played it more coy, choosing a ring is a little trickier.
A good place to start is to take note of the kind of jewelry they like. Check their jewelery draw, notice if they prefer white or yellow gold jewellery and if their style is classic, vintage or more alternative. Consider their lifestyle – are they athletic? Do they use their hands often? If you’re really struggling, ask a friend or family member who’s in the know but can also keep a secret.
How can I tell what their ring size is?
If you’re planning on keeping your proposal under wraps, then this is another task that will require some sleuthing. If they wear rings on either their left or right third fingers, then borrow one and take to a jeweller for sizing. “If you can’t take this ring out of the home, trace the inside of the ring and compare against an online ring size guide.” If they don’t wear rings, according to Jason, the average US ring size for a woman is “L”. If you do get the size wrong though, don’t worry, you can always have it resized post-proposal.
How far in advance should I buy the ring?
Allow yourself a couple of months before you want to propose. Deciding on a ring will take time, plus most jewelers will take around two to four weeks to create the ring and have it sized for you. Avoid rushing the process of finding an engagement ring. This is possibly one of the most important jewellery purchases in your life, so take the time to do your research on what your partner will like.
What should you look for in a diamond?
The four Cs to follow if you’re buying a diamond are:
Color: Diamonds are placed on a colour scale: the less color, the more valuable. A colourless diamond is the traditional route but you can also opt for something more modern and eye-catching like a yellow or pink diamond.
Clarity: Rated on a clarity scale of “inclusion” (natural blemishes that aren’t generally visible to the naked eye), the less blemishes, the more valuable.
Carat: Naturally, the heavier the diamond, the more you will pay. Just remember, bigger isn’t always better. Your partner will probably want to wear their engagement ring everyday, so it’s important to think about what will work with their lifestyle, rather than buying the biggest rock you can afford.
Cut: Round or princess (square) cuts tend to be the most popular, but there's an endless sea of cut variation available. This is when you might want to bring in a friend or family member to help advise on what shape to choose.
Diamond alternatives to consider
If your would-be spouse tends to skew more alternative than classic when it comes to style, then you may want to consider a different gem to diamonds. When shopping for gemstones, the same four Cs apply, with a particular focus on colour. Color has many more aspects here, including shade, saturation and dispersion across the gemstone. “Some shades are considered more valuable than others but we would say that it's important to choose one that you really love more than anything.”
Sapphire: The second hardest mineral after diamonds, sapphires are traditionally beloved for their deep blue shade, but are also available in myriad colours, including yellow and pink (Princess Eugenie said yes to a blush sapphire ring). The stone became a popular engagement ring choice when Prince William proposed to Kate Middleton with a 12-carat oval blue sapphire and 18-carat white gold ring that originally belonged to his mother.
Emerald: One for the green lovers, emerald engagement rings have adorned the high-profiled fingers of Jackie Kennedy, Grace Kelly and Victoria Beckham (just one of her many engagement rings).
Ruby: Ranging in pink to blood-red shades, the ruby is held with high esteem in Asian cultures and is said to symbolise passion, wisdom and success. While it tends to be less common than sapphires and emeralds, Orlando Bloom recently proposed to Katy Perry with a floral-inspired ruby engagement ring surrounded in a halo of eight diamonds.
Other options: The coloured stones listed above may be the most popular diamond alternatives, but they’re not the only options. Seek out the more modern and alternative ring designers and you’ll find styles sporting everything from opals, to garnets and aquamarine.
The setting
The main stone can come in the form of a cluster, a halo, solitaire or three stones. Then on the band itself, stones can be inserted through channeling grooves or paving rock by rock. This alters the way the stone is presented.
Band materials
White gold, yellow gold and platinum are all very traditional options, with rose gold now becoming more and more popular. There are many different metals, all of which vary in grade, strength, colour and price. Make sure the jeweller you choose is licensed and reputable and then begin firing them with questions.
Do diamonds hold their value?
After one to three billion years existing as crystallised carbon, what difference is another five years going to make to its value? Well, buying an engagement ring is not exactly a sound investment it turns out. The Guardian reports that, “A retailer can mark up a new diamond ring by up to 100 per cent and it could lose half its value the moment that you leave the shop. Even with a diamond bought at the virtually wholesale rates of London's jewellery centre, Hatton Garden, it could take more than five years to regain its price.” It’s the thought that counts, though, right?
How do I find an ethical engagement ring?
The diamond industry has, thankfully, come along way since the infamous Leonardo DiCaprio Blood Diamond days. Still, there are some tactics to employ to ensure your beloved doesn’t end up with bling that has caused harm. For starters, you’ll want to only buy a diamond that is Kimberley Process certified, which is designed to reduce the flow of conflict diamonds. This certification isn’t a catch-all though, so, according to Fenton's Lambert, it’s also important to ask questions before handing your cash over.
“I would ask your jeweler if they made the piece themselves and if so where and in what conditions?” advises Lambert. “If your jeweller isn't aware of their own supply chain and manufacturing process then that shows a lack of care about the quality and design of the piece as well as the ethical standards.”
